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Exhausted

He walked to his study like a zombie. His eyes were puffy and he had dark circles. He had not combed his hair for at least couple of days now. It might be because it was a Sunday afternoon. He had followed fairly the same kind of routine for the past few years – wake up around 7 in the morning, have a quick run and get ready for the 9 am mass, go to brunch with either family or friends, do some work around the yard, have a head start for Monday and go to bed after an early dinner. It would be the third time he had missed his routine, but no one had complained – maybe yet. He walked to his study to get away from all the work and close his eyes shut for some time. The soft white light made his study bright. He could sleep even if there was a thunder struck next to him, but he wanted to be surrounded by darkness for some time. He switched off the lights and walked to the close the blinds and curtains. He peeked through the window to see the neighborhood kids playing baseball. He laid on his recliner and thought about his childhood playing baseball while falling asleep.

He had always been a sprinter. He ran towards the base for the home run. It was the 7th inning and his team was already leading by a wide margin. He could hear the catcher shouting to the outfielder to throw the ball to him. He was in no mood to get out. He picked up his pace a little. The catcher was moving around and made it difficult for him to see the base. He didn’t pay attention to the direction of the ball, his entire attention was to get to the base. When he slid near the base to touch it, the catcher was in his path. He thought the catcher was trying to interfere with him, but little did he know that the ball was coming at him. His nose intercepted the ball at its full speed before giving a chance to the catcher. He could sense his legs touching the base and his white jersey getting covered in blood. He felt nauseous, funny and dizzy. He jerked a bit and woke up at the sound of the shattering glass.

He wanted to get up to check the source, but was too tired to even care what happened. He could hear his wife’s frustration with the kids for making too much noise. He peeked through the curtain again. There weren’t any kids around. He was sure everyone should have run away. He knows which kids were playing and knows that he need to talk to their parents. He couldn’t care less about that. He was too tired and exhausted that he started to accept whatever happened around him without questioning. He made sure the curtains are closed again to make the room darker. He came back to the recliner and when he was about to close his eyes, the phone started to ring. He had restrained from installing an extension at his study so that he needs to walk outside his study when the phone rang. He sighed at his stupidity and wanted the phone at his arm’s reach. The call going to voicemail is the last thing he remembered before falling asleep again. BloodHis fear of blood had been increasing from the day at the baseball game. He had more and more difficulties having to find ways to avoid blood and hospital. He tried to avoid doing activities that might cause him to see blood. He had stopped playing that might cause injury. All his doctor’s visit was difficult due to the hospital odor. His distinct memory of hemophobia was when he visited his friend admitted to the hospital for the motorcycle accident. It had been a couple of weeks since the accident. All his friends were planning to visit. Even though they were aware of his situation, they had convinced him to accompany them by saying there will be no visible blood and he could wear masks while in the hospital. What surprised them was the scratches in the face and hand still had dried up blood. He could sense his heart beat a little faster and him feeling dizzy while talking. What he didn’t know was he had passed out while talking and laid down in the adjacent bed for a couple of hours until his friends woke him. He was ashamed he has become a laughing stock. His sleep was disturbed again when his wife started calling his name.

She said that the phone had been ringing continuously and asked him to attend. He reluctantly got up. The phone stopped ringing, but the display flashed there were 3 new voicemails. He wasn’t interested to hear the voicemail or give a call back. He just took the receiver off the handle and placed it next to the phone. This looked a lot simpler than talking. He didn’t go to his study, but went upstairs to his wife. He felt he should hug her tight and plant a deep kiss. When she was admitted to the hospital, he didn’t want to be in the same room as her. He was afraid that he might pass out again and cause more frustration to her. He climbed the stairs slowly, but he had paced outside the hospital room when she was there. It had been close to 9 hours and he knew it took all her strength to ask him not to be in the room. He didn’t want to miss that moment. He wanted to be beside her, holding her hand and supporting her. When he saw his wife rocking the baby’s crib, he was really happy that he went into the delivery room before his daughter was born. He planted a huge kiss on his wife’s cheeks and started rocking the crib gently. He was sure he could sacrifice sleep any day over this feeling.

The worst fear of my life

I trembled with fear. My heart raced faster than a train and at the same time tried to go slower than a snail. It was a mixed emotion. I felt inebriated. I tried to open my eyes to see clearly what happened around me. I was not able to understand what I experienced. I was not able to perceive the surroundings except vehicle’s screeching sound beside me.  It was chaos and I didn’t like it a bit.  I didn’t know whether I had my eyes open, whether it was day or night, whether I was in my home or office, whether I was thirsty or hungry, whether I was dressed or not. I wasn’t aware whether I was conscious or not either. It was utter mess.

It was hard for me to recollect what had happened for me to end up like this. It could be a dream too, but I was able to feel my body reacting, to be honest I have had this feeling in dreams too. I struggled a bit to remember what had happened. I had gone to the office in the morning, then Starbucks in the afternoon to get a hot chocolate to escape the cold winter winds and feel warmth in my hands. I had woken up as usual when the alarm played my favorite song. Before leaving for work, I had dropped my kids at the day care and kissed them good bye. I had a salad for lunch. All these things were my daily routine. I had called my wife around 4 to give her a heads up that I would be late and she had to pick up the kids, which was new. I was perplexed as why I wasn’t able to remember where I ended up.

Remembering the call to my wife helped me to regain my memory that I had stayed late for a meeting. I heard sirens at the same moment. There was a cold stream breeze that stuck my face, slowing down the blood dripping from my forehead. I could taste the fresh blood in mouth. I remembered all the time I used to suck my fingers to halt the blood flow. I tried to move my hands to check the origin of the blood, but all my efforts were futile. My entire body weight was on my left arm, body stuck under the seatbelt and my right hand falling off the shoulder socket. It was either the break or accelerator pedal that I felt near my thighs. I could hear my heart slowing down. Lot of questions were going through my brain. How did I end up like this? Did I hit someone? Did someone else hit me? Is it a multi vehicle collision? Are the other passengers safe? Was there children in any of the car? The mere thought of multi vehicle collision game me the chills. I didn’t know whether it was the questions that caused my brain to ache or the accident.

Source: Google Search

My concentration was diverted when I heard people around me made noise. I could sense someone’s hand feeling my body to reach under my arms. I tried to assist them by moving a little, but the hand retrieved instantly as I moved. I thought I scared them by my action. Damn, I should have stayed still, I thought. I did hear broken words like ice, slippery, bad, accident, blood and fire. I didn’t try to remember what had happened anymore, I was able to relive those moments. My car skid on the ice and I had hit the side railing. I hit my head on the steering wheel before the air bag had deployed. At the same time my car was coming to a stop, there was another car skid at the same patch of ice and t-boned me.

My thoughts weren’t streamlined anymore. I wanted to make sure my wife knew that I was okay, but didn’t know whether I would be able to. I was really concerned that she could be worried that something bad happened to me. I was ready to be rescued, treated and sent back to my loving home. I wasn’t willed to leave my wife and kids behind or say goodbye to my parents. I didn’t wish to give up on my dream of setting up my own wine yard. I had lot of things to achieve. I had lot of things to complete. I felt I haven’t showed my wife the love she deserved. I realized I haven’t shown appreciation to my parents for the sacrifice they have made. I haven’t told my kids how much I adore them. There were so many things I had procrastinated daily which I regretted now. I haven’t created a legacy for myself. Nobody would remember me except for my family and friends, and even they will eventually will move on with their life. I didn’t want to leave this world like this. Not many people get a second chance in life and I don’t wish to be one among them. I wasn’t prepared to die, but didn’t know whether I had a choice.

Lot of obscure questions popped up on my mind. How does one know that they are ready to leave everything behind? I wasn’t ready, and I was sure that I will not be ready even I was given next fifty years. Do I have to be ready any moment? I don’t know. Was I given a choice to be ready to be born? I don’t know. So I guessed it’s not a factor of being ready or given a choice, but to accept what’s ahead. The feeling that I would not see my kids again made my heart feel light and my eyes started watering. I didn’t know what would happen to me, but I prayed for a chance to see my wife and kids once again.

I felt something stung on my chest, someone tried to cut the seat belt. The pain of not seeing my family was more prominent than the knife poking my chest. Though I didn’t know who yelled, that time I clearly heard “Back off! Back off NOW!” I could really feel the stress on the words now cutting through the cold air. Not just the space around me got warmer each second, but my body too. I felt like I stood between the sprinklers on my front yard when water sprayed over me. I had overcome many hardships in my life, however I didn’t know whether this was one amongst them. I wasn’t able to open my eyes anymore due to the bright light. I closed my eyes for the moment to pass.

10 laugh out loud moments in Vedhalam!

  1. Ajith Kumar and Lakshmi Menon rented a house even before getting her admission in college. What a confidence! Pha
  2. The heroine has provided some comic relief with her dumb acting. I even doubt whether Shruthi Hassan knows her dad is a talented actor.Vedhalam
  3. National language of the world is Tamil.
  4. Instead of removing and wearing the sunglass often Ajith keeps smiling in this movie. If someone smiles like this in the streets, they will look like a creep.
  5. I was patiently waiting for 180 degree dance of Ajith, but got to see only the 180 degree camera turn in the songs.
  6. Some of the notable hero qualities are bullet proof body, chasing a car in lightning speed, getting massive hit and still no visible injury other than little blood loss and most importantly making a girl fall in love with an emotional flash back.
  7. The villains have some ape shit technology which can change a simple cell phone to sonar. Maybe they borrowed it from Lucius Fox from Batman universe.
  8. The doctors diagnosing a mental issue after a surgery.
  9. The villain was admiring the acting talents of the hero in climax instead of killing him or at least trying to escape.
  10. Some of the notable qualities of goons – standing and waiting for their turn to get trashed, shooting but missing target and falling faster than a domino.

Why I didn’t like Naanum Rowdy Thaan!

Source: Why I didn’t like Naanum Rowdy Thaan!

We should leave behind the logic at home before going for a comedy genre movie. This will really help us to connect with the characters and enjoy. Take for an instance, the movie Pachantanthiram. Many scenes are not possible in real life – taking a corpse out of a hotel without anyone noticing, jumping between vehicles during the climax chase – but still we enjoyed the movie because we were able to connect with the protagonist and his friends. And there are movies like Thenaliraman where no one can connect with the characters and even the slapsticks aren’t funny. There are many more movies I can cite that falls in these two categories. Then there is a third kind of movies which are truly funny but fails to connect with the audience on emotional level. Naanum Rowdy Thaan is one such movie – not because it is a dark comedy, but because of its superficial characters.

Naanum-RowdydhaanIt’s beyond my imagination on how can someone think that lying is better than coming in terms with a family member demise. I would have liked the movie better if the story had taken us through the emotions of both Vijay Sethupathi and Nayantara after finding out her father’s death and falling in love eventually. However for adding couple of funny scenes to the screenplay, the story teller decided to move the story in a different direction. The reasons for falling in love also wasn’t convincing. I was really hoping that Nayantara was just pretending to be in love with Vijay Sethupathi to take revenge on the villain and also for lying to her about her father’s death. Alas, I was disappointed again. When there are movies such as 36 Vayadhinile which has strong women characters, there are movies like Naanum Rowdy Thaan in which women are shown so much dependent on men in their life. When our society is trying to be establish equality, these kind of wildly popular characters set us back in time.

If the movie story had taken the audience with the highs and lows of the character’s sadness, happiness, anger, silliness the movie would have struck a chord with the viewers. However the director concentrated on only one emotion, silliness, and left the rest in the lurch. I saw many comparing this movie to be on par with Soodu Kaavum. My personal opinion is – Soodu Kavum was and is miles apart from Naanum Rowdy Thaan. Within 30 mins of Naan Rowdy Thaan, I lost interest to associate with the movie due to immaturity of the character and wasn’t able to enjoy the movie as much as I should have.

I might be singled out with my opinion when most of the major media houses has termed the movie as a trend setter. The director has to be recognized for his talents, but at the same time should be criticized for his poor attempt in character development.

10 things I learnt after watching Papanasam

The Critic's Cut

  1. I didn’t know Tamil. First few minutes I was confused which language movie I was sitting.
  2. Giving advice to people is the new trend with story telling. Please go this movie at your own risk.
  3. The police will work only based on hunch and not on evidence.Papanasam_poster
  4. People conveniently disappear when something important happens (pushing the car into the lake, burying the dead body, etc)
  5. The protagonist learnt everything from movies; so plans elaborately to hide the crime but doesn’t remember to ask for a warrant when the police take his family to the interrogation.
  6. When I thought the movie is almost over its the time for the director to place the interval card.
  7. The IG can script the entire story how the crime is hidden like she was seeing it.
  8. The police use illegal methods to get find out what happened, but forgets to use a secret recording device (…

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10 things I learnt after watching I

The Critic's Cut

  1. It is very important for someone to be with the bride as it seems easy to abduct even with 100+ around (ps: the kidnapper will exactly know when the bride will be alone).
  2. You can find an abandoned house in the middle of nowhere with fully functional utilities.I poster
  3. It is socially accepted and is completely normal if you are overly obsessed with a model.
  4. You can find the person who will win a competition, if everyone is trying to fight him to death.
  5. I don’t know where story writers meet transgender people, but the writers tend to follow one particular type just to get some cheap laughs.
  6. If there is a pill to help me get rid of the native accent, I need to find it. It seems the hero was able to get rid of his once he became famous.
  7. A guillotine can be used to shave off the…

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10 things I learnt after watching Kaththi

The Critic's Cut

  1. Not only visitors are allowed inside Chennai international airports till the check in counter, but also all the passengers/visitors/employees inside the airport are trained in the same dance routine.
  2. If someone slaps you, don’t get angry. Ask for their help to slap someone who had slapped earlier. Bonus: if they had stalked you sometime, be comfortable enough to hang around them and even fall in love with out hesitation.
  3. It is widely known there might be seven people that resemble me. If someone decides to impersonate me they can just swap my wallet, watch and phone. No one will be able to know the difference.kaththi poster
  4. If I see an old person struggling to breath, feeding them bread is more effective than calling an ambulance.
  5. Corporate heads calls and meets in person to make sure that if they are caught for any illegal doing everyone involved can be easily traced and…

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